


Vulnerable Vagrants

by conceptstage



Series: Critical Fiction [23]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: M/M, Oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-08
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-28 05:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16235306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: Prompt from Tumblr: Pumat Sol/Caduceus Clay





	Vulnerable Vagrants

“Ah,” said the Pumat at the counter as Caduceus and Beau stepped into his shop. “If it isn’t two of my favorite customers. What can I do for the two of you today?”

Beau opened her mouth to speak but paused when there was a crash from the back and heavy, hurried footsteps heading towards them. Another Pumat came out of the back room, stopping in his tracks when he saw them. Well, not ‘them’ exactly. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Caduceus. This one was wearing goggles on his head, so it must have been Pumat Prime.

“Ah, hello,” Pumat Prime said, clearing his throat and patting down his hair. “What can I do for you today, Mr. Clay?”

Caduceus gave him an utterly clueless grin. “Good morning, Pumat Sol Prime.”

“You can just call me Pumat.”

“But wouldn’t that be confusing? There are four Pumats.”

“Well, you could call me Pumie. Some people call me Pumie.”

“In that case you can call me Caduceus. Or Cad. Or Duece. Or anything you please, to be honest. Most people do.”

Beau raised an eyebrow and stepped away when Prime stepped up to stand in front of Caduceus. She walked up to the counter. “If I didn’t know better, I might think your Prime’s got a bit of a crush.”

Counter-Pumat smiled softly. “Yes, he does.”

“Oh yeah? Did he tell you so?”

“I am an exact copy of him,” he said, sorting through papers. “I feel it too. We all feel it.”

Beau’s jaw dropped and she looked over to where Prime was flirting with a still oblivious Caduceus. Caduceus had never been flirted with before, it wouldn’t surprise her if he never clued in. “Really, all four of you? Damn, Clay’s got game.”

“We should have a drink sometime,” Prime said, twisting his fingers nervously. “Just you and me.”

“Oh, uh, yes, I think that would be nice,” Caduceus said. He glanced at Beau and she hurriedly turned away so that it didn’t seem like she was eavesdropping. “Beau actually came for something particular.”

“One of the Pumats will take care of her. Is there anything that you need?”

“No, thank you very much. I’m just hanging out with her today.”

Beau shrugged. “Don’t worry about me, Deuce. You do you. Or do him, whichever.”

Caduceus blinked at her, incomprehensibly. “I don’t understand what that means.”

Prime cleared his throat and stepped even closer to Caduceus. “It means that you can come with me for drinks if you’d like.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Beau said, grinning. “Go, have fun. I’ll be fine. We’ll talk tonight. I want to hear everything.”

“Well, if you want to know what happens you should come with us.”

“No,” Prime and Beau said at the exact same time.

Counter-Pumat cleared his throat and finished his calculations. “Twenty gold, Beauregard, if you please.”

Beau nodded and began counting it out as Caduceus and Prime started to leave the store. “You feeling jealous?” she asked Counter-Pumat. “You’ve got a crush on my friend too.”

Pumat shook his head. “No. Not jealous. If Prime is on a date with him, it’s the same to me as if I were on a date with him.”

Beau’s nose scrunched up a little in confusion. “That’s… weird. But great, good for you. Wow, Jester is gonna love this.”


End file.
